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Thank you for your question canfmach!
Looking into this, it appears "Microsoft SQL Server Management Studio Compatible" can connect to MySQL remotely. Please see the following.
From those article you should be able to set it up. Looks like the MySQL drivers will need to be downloaded for it.
If you did this already, make sure you have all permissions given to the database user and that the full username is being used. You can try using your cPanel username and cPanel password. The cPanel user has full permissions already. Just make sure you are using your domain, server hostname, or the server IP. You can also add a % to allow all IP addresses to see if the IP is problematic.
You can use other programs that are free. Please see the following.
Using Heidi SQL to access MySQL Databases
Best Regards,James R
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